do narcissists know they are narcissists

Do Narcissists Know they are Narcissists? Know The Truth!

For a while now, people who act narcissistically have puzzled researchers and others who observe them. Narcissism means having an overly big view of oneself, always wanting attention, and not being very understanding of others. This leads to a big question: Do those who act like this know they’re doing it? This article looks into the complicated world of narcissism to figure out if people who show these traits actually realize they’re like that.


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In this article, we’re delving into the world of narcissism – when people think a lot about themselves and don’t always understand how others feel. We’re asking a big question: Do those who act this way realize it? Some do, but others struggle to see it because they don’t really know themselves. Narcissism has a wide range, from healthy self-confidence to being overly self-centered. This range shows us that people understand their behavior in different ways. Sometimes, it’s hard for them to see their problems, and this can make relationships difficult. If you want to talk to someone about their narcissism, you need to be careful because people react differently. It might help them become better if they think about their actions, but sometimes, experts can help these conversations more. It’s important to take care of yourself when having these talks. Studies show that narcissists often think highly of themselves but also deny they have these traits. This research helps us understand more about narcissism and how it affects people and relationships.

Top Questions

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Usually, narcissistic individuals know about their manipulative behaviors. They frequently employ these strategies to keep control and reach their objectives. However, they might justify their manipulation as necessary and not view it as negatively as others do.
Narcissists generally struggle with genuine remorse for their actions, as they prioritize their needs over others’. Any semblance of regret might be superficial, driven by a desire to maintain relationships or obtain personal benefits, rather than sincere remorse.
Narcissists might not truly forget about people, especially if they perceive them as a threat or a potential source of attention. They might keep tabs on individuals, but their focus will largely be self-centered, with interactions revolving around their needs and desires.

Blind Spots of A Narcissist

Understanding if People with Narcissistic Traits Know They're Narcissistic

Narcissism is a complicated personality trait marked by feeling overly important, always wanting attention, and not being empathetic. One interesting question is whether folks with narcissistic traits realize they have those traits. This article looks into how much people with narcissistic tendencies usually understand about their own personalities and behaviors.

Different Levels of Knowing about Narcissism

Different Levels of Knowing about Narcissism

Narcissism comes in different levels, going from healthy self-confidence to extreme narcissism. It’s important to remember that not everyone who shows signs of narcissism has a diagnosed mental condition called Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Some folks might show narcissistic behaviors without meeting the requirements for NPD.

Not Seeing Themselves Clearly

Not Seeing Themselves Clearly

Studies indicate that individuals possessing narcissistic traits frequently fail to recognize the impact of their behavior on others. Their excessive self-perception acts as a barrier to keeping their flaws hidden. They may struggle to maintain healthy relationships as a result of their lack of self-awareness, and they may also act in ways that exploit or manipulate other people.

Defending Themselves and Ignoring Reality

Defending Themselves and Ignoring Reality

People with narcissism often use defense mechanisms, like pretending things aren’t true or blaming others, to avoid facing hard truths about themselves. These defenses act like shields that keep them from seeing their narcissistic sides. Essentially, they trick themselves, blaming others for the negative things they do instead of looking at themselves.

Different Levels of Knowing

Different Levels of Knowing

Understanding that individuals with narcissism can vary in their self-awareness is crucial. Those with mild narcissistic tendencies might occasionally recognize that their actions lead to issues, particularly when they reflect on their behavior or witness negative outcomes.

Nonetheless, taking a genuine introspective look and acknowledging their own narcissistic traits is challenging due to the excessive self-centered focus that narcissism entails.

Should You Tell A Narcissist That They Are A Narcissist?

Is it a Good Idea to Tell Someone They Might be a Narcissist?

Grasping the Situation

Before you decide whether to talk to someone about their potential narcissistic traits, it’s really important to understand the whole situation and how you two relate. Think about why you want to have this talk. Are you truly worried about their well-being, or are you feeling upset or frustrated?

Knowing Themselves Better

Possible Good Things: Knowing Themselves Better

Bringing up the idea that someone might have narcissistic qualities could help them learn more about themselves. If they’re open to thinking about how they act, this realization might make them look at what they do and even consider getting help if they think it’s needed. It could be a way for them to grow as a person and make their relationships healthier.

When and How to Bring it Up

When and How to Bring it Up

How you talk about it is really important. Pick a quiet and private place where you both can chat honestly. Use sentences that start with “I” to talk about what you’ve seen and how you feel without sounding like you’re blaming them. Be ready for different reactions, and stay calm even if they don’t respond well right away.

Figuring Out if They’ll Get It or Need Professional Help

Figuring Out if They'll Get It or Need Professional Help

Think about whether they’ll listen to what you’re saying and whether it will help. Sometimes, suggesting they talk to a pro, like a therapist, might work better. Therapists know how to talk about these things and can give them a safe place to explore themselves.

Taking Care of Yourself

Talking about narcissism could be really hard on you. Make sure you’re ready in your mind for how they might react. Set limits, and be ready to stop talking if things get tense or aren’t going well. Your well-being is important too.

Wrapping it Up

Wrapping it Up

Deciding whether to tell someone they might be a narcissist is a big choice. Even if you want to help, what happens can be different depending on whether they’re ready to hear it.

It’s about thinking about their well-being and also how it might affect your relationship and how you feel. If you’re not sure, talking to a mental health pro can help you figure out what’s best.


A research paper published in 2020 in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found that people with narcissistic traits tend to strongly believe they’re better than others, more so than those without narcissistic tendencies. What’s intriguing is that these individuals also tend to deny having any narcissistic traits in themselves.

The researchers who conducted the study propose that this behavior might come from the warped way these narcissistic individuals see themselves, where they don’t accurately judge their own abilities.

Likewise, a different study released in 2021 in the Clinical Psychological Science journal unveiled that narcissistic individuals demonstrate a greater propensity to agree with statements on a narcissism scale.

These statements assess their elevated self-regard, feelings of entitlement, and willingness to exploit others. However, this study also underscored that narcissistic individuals are less prone than those without narcissistic traits to support statements that reveal vulnerability and sensitivity to criticism.


In the world of narcissism, the big question is whether people know how they act. Studies show that folks with narcissistic traits often struggle to understand how their actions affect others. They’re not very good at seeing their own mistakes, which makes their relationships tough and sometimes tricky.

Deciding whether to talk to someone about their narcissistic behavior is a big choice because they might get defensive. Bringing up the topic might help them learn about themselves and grow, but it’s also smart to get advice from mental health experts.

Knowing about narcissism is important for both people who act that way and those who want to deal with them in a good way. It’s all about realizing how we behave and helping each other get better.


Will a narcissist ever realize what they are?
Whether a narcissist becomes conscious of their traits varies from person to person. Some might eventually acknowledge their behavior through self-examination or input from others, whereas others could stay unaware because they’re defensive and overly focused on themselves.

Are narcissists self-aware that they are narcissists?
Narcissists often lack full self-awareness about their narcissistic behavior. While they might realize they have certain tendencies, they frequently downplay or rationalize them, avoiding acknowledging their impact on others.

What happens when a narcissist knows you know they are a narcissist?
If a narcissist feels like their characteristics are being noticed, they could react by becoming defensive or aggressive. They could manipulate situations to regain control, deny the label, or even intensify their narcissistic behavior to protect their self-image.


The information in this article is not intended to be medical advice. If you are concerned about narcissism or infidelity, please consult with a qualified mental health professional.

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